Lost In Confusion
by evilbuffyfan4eva
Summary: Buffy goes to see Angel after the attempted rape for some comfort but she gets more then she wanted. Pairing Buffy/Angel and Buffy/Connor.
1. Chapter 1

AN: Hi guys, I know I haven't updated my other fics but I have got lost on them so I thought I was write this one before I lost this one too. lol. I'm sorry about the summary will change later on but at the moment I don't wanna give to much away so when I write more. Also Thanks To Daryl There Aren't Mistakes Anymore. Thank Him By Read Distant Love On My Account On Fictionpress And Review http://www. fictionpress. com/s/2759855/1/Distant_Love (remove the spaces)

But if you want a little bit more here it is:

* * *

Buffy was hurt more when in seeing red so when she goes to Angel he knows something is wrong but takes it in the wrong way and becomes mad at Buffy. Connor helps Buffy please, like, Angel he fell in love with her when he first saw her. he is mad that His father and Buffy still love each other so he tries and gets Buffy =D okay that's all for now I know not that good but I'm trying lol =D

enjoy.

Buffy walks into the hotel, looking around at the big lobby. No one was at the desk and no one was on the lobby or on the stairs.

"Hello?" Buffy says load. She was shaking a little as she looked around.

"Hi, can I help you?"

Buffy looks to where the voice came from. She saw that it was a boy with brown hair and was quite tall.

"Ummm…I was looking for Angel. Is he here?"

The young boy walks to her. "No, sorry he went out. Can I help you? Are you okay?" He asks her seeing the bruises on her neck, wrist and eye.

"Umm, no thanks. I just really need to talk to Angel. When will he be back?"

"I don't know. Come on sit down, I'll get you a drink. What do you want?"

"Nothing thanks, I'm fine."

He moves to her and sits them down on the chair.

_She is so beautiful._ He thinks.

"What's wrong? Is it a demon problem?"

She lets out a sigh. "Yeah, it is."

"Tell me. I'm stronger then I look. I can get rid of it for you."

"I can get rid of it but I need to talk to Angel."

"Okay, sorry, I'm Connor." She looks at him.

_Connor. He mentioned a Connor._ "I'm-" she was cut off; she sensed Angel in the courtyard, she gets up and walks to the door.

She stayed by the door as the rest of the AI team where out there. When Angel saw her he said, "I knew I could sense you." Cordelia rolled her eyes and walks past Buffy, she would of bumped into Buffy's shoulder but Buffy flinched away. She then walks over to Angel.

"Hello Buffy." Wesley says.

"Hey," Buffy smiles at him. "What's up with Cordy? She still hates me?"

"Oh, honey you are beautiful. Angel always said you were."

Buffy doesn't move, just pulls her shoulders up, "And don't worry about Cordelia she just has this thing for Angel. But Angel won't look at her while you're still in his head." Buffy looks at the floor and Angel watches her. "Okay we'll leave you two to It." says the green demon and then walks inside followed by Fred and Gunn who says "Hi" to Buffy as they walk past her.

They both stand there waiting for the door to be closed.

Angel was looking at Buffy trying to see if she was okay. He saw the bruises and was worried. She wouldn't look at him.

"Buffy?" she takes a while to look up but when she does she only looks at his chest and the floor close to his feet. Angel could see the bruises clearly now even though it was night. They were so bad that they were easy to see even without his vampire eyesight. "What happened? You okay?" there was pure concern in his voice.

"I just needed to talk to you. But I should leave. I shouldn't have interrupted your life again, I'm sorry."

She goes to walk past him but he grabs her arm making her react in a way that Angel never thought he would see Buffy react.

She turned around and almost punched him in the face. Stopping only millimetres away from his face.

"Good reflexes." He lets go of her other arm as she lowers the other.

"Sorry."

"It's okay. What happened? Who-what did this?" He knew Spike had something to do with this, he could smell Spike on her.

"Can we talk about something different?"

"Sure." He just wanted to keep Buffy here. He would talk about whatever she wanted to just to make that happen but soon he would find out what happened. He moves to the beach and sits offering Buffy to sit next to him but she doesn't take it. "What do you want to talk about?"

"Cordelia?" she asked.

"I don't know, Lorne said she has a thing for me."

_If he has feelings for her he won't love me. Then he won't care about what happened. I could leave now and not come back because he will have her. _Buffy was trying to convince herself that coming here was a bad idea. She changed her mind talking to Angel about what happened wasn't a good idea. "Do you love her?"

"What? No, you know I don't. You know I love you." He pauses. Should he shouldn't he? He didn't know if he should ask this question but he was going to. "Maybe the question I need to ask if what been going on with you and Spike? I can smell him on you, it's more than just patrolling here and there. What have you been doing?"

She looked at him, the anger in his eyes made her feel worse than ever.

"Do you love him?" she shook her head and moved her eyes away from his, she couldn't look at him, he knew what she has done with his childe.

They were silent, Angel had thoughts of her and Spike running through his head.

"So…you don't love him but you were screwing him?" Angel asked bitterly.

"I didn't love Parker or Riley but I slept with them." She was hoping that talking about her other relationships might make Angel forget some of his anger but it didn't work.

"Why?!? Why would you sleep with him?"

"I don't want to talk about it." her voice stranded with tears that were blurring her vision.

"Why? He hurt you? What do you expect from a soulless creature? He gave it to you rough, well that's what you deserve." Her tears feel at his harsh words. She walks past him and away into the night wiping her eyes. Angel watched her go, the anger made him not care where she was going.

From inside Connor saw the team walk in.

"Hi, who was she?" he asked Cordelia as she was the first one in.

"SHE! That little bitch is Buffy."

"Buffy?" He repeats. "As in dad's true love?" Cordelia nods and walks upstairs.

When the rest of the team walk in Connor hears them saying,

"She is so sweet, smaller than any other slayer I have seen." Lorne says.

"Don't worry about her she is very strong." Wesley insures Lorne.

"But did you see the bruised?" Fred asks from a few feet behind them. When they turn to look at her she continues, " The bruises on her face, she must of got them in a bad fight to make them that dark."

"Buffy does get a few beating but she'll be fine."

"You didn't see them in the light and if my senses are right she was scared of something. I think it was more than a fight that did that to her." Connors says walking past them and to the door to watch his father and Buffy.

"Well yes she did look bad But Angel will look after her." Wesley says to Connor who was paying much attention, instead he was looking out the glass at his father and Buffy. He ignored what the people inside were saying and tried to hear what Buffy and Angel was saying.

He could hear the anger and harsh tone in Angel voice and then saw Buffy walk off.

Angel slowly made his way up the steps to the hotel and pushed through the door. Connor was looking at him, and he didn't look too happy.

"What did you say to her?"

Angel pushed pasted the young boy and was about to walk upstairs when Connor pulled him back.

"I asked you a question." Angel grabbed him and throws him into a wall holding him there.

"It's none of your business." Angel says in almost a growl.

"Angel?" Gunn says from the lobby. "Calm down. Where's Buffy?" Angel let go of Connor and turned to everyone.

He was still angry and wasn't thinking about what he was saying. "She's probably whoring around the corner."

The team looked at him. Cordelia was at the top of the stairs and was listening to the conversation she thought it was quiet funny that Buffy was now showing her true colors.

Wesley was in shock. He knew Buffy and she wouldn't do that so he was wondering why Angel was saying this. "Angel, why say such a thing?"

He looked at them and then tried to get up the stairs again but was stopped by Connor shouting at him. "You really think she would be "whoring"? You have told me and everyone else here how much you love her, how much she means to you and what she is like. You calling her a 'Whore' makes me think that you don't feel anything for her!" Angel grabbed his and through him on the floor, holding him down.

"She means everything to me. She is the only person in the world that I love and ever will love."

"Then why are you letting her walk off into the night when you know what dangers there are and knowing that she is hurt?"

Angel looks at him and let's go of him a little. Then he remembers Buffy and Spike together. He didn't look at anyone; he just walked up the stairs and into his room slamming the door shut.

Connor gets up and straightens his clothes out.

"I'm going to find Buffy, she looked really hurt and then I'll bring her back here."

He goes to walk out the door when Wesley says, "If Angel doesn't want her here then Buffy will know and then she won't come here."

"Fine then I'll take her to another hotel or something. But I'm not leaving her out there."

With that Connor walks out the hotel looking for Buffy.

"I think he has the hots for her." Gunn says looking at the teenager rushing out the hotel.

"They say like father like son." Lorne shouts over the desk as he was staying over there.

Out on the dark, cold and dangerous night Connor looked around the street from Buffy he was looking for about 20 Minutes until he saw Buffy. She was just walking around. As the streets where quiet in this part of town it was easy to find her.

Connor walks fast to catch her. "Hey." He says offering her a smile.

"Hey." She says back but doesn't smile. Her arms where wrapped around her to stop the cold night air touching her skin but she was failing.

"You okay?" He asked her but she didn't reply. "You're freezing." He pulled off his jacket and put it over her shoulders; she took it and held it close to her.

"Thanks, but won't you get cold?"

"Nah, I like the cold."

They keep walking for a bit until Buffy stopped.

"What's wrong?" Connor asked, there were tears rolling down her face.

"He's never going to forgive me."

_So I'm the one that come looking for her and she only thinks of him._ Connor thought bitterly.

"I'm sure he will. Come on let's get back to the hotel so you can rest."

"I'm fine." She says with a strong voice trying to show that she was fine when really she was falling apart inside.

"That's a lie. If it's because out don't want to go to the hotel I know other places we can stay for the night."

"We? You should go back."

"I'm not leaving you."

She didn't want to fight and she really did want to sleep. "Okay."

"Right it's only down here a little." She nods and continues to walk with him next to her.

Five minute they reach a hotel, "How much is it a night?" Buffy asked. She didn't have much cash on her and she had no idea how much was in her bank account.

"Don't worry about it." he walks through the doors and Buffy follows. Inside was warm and relaxing. Buffy took a deep breath in and left the warm air fill her body.

After a moment Connor had the key to the room and they both walked up there.

In the room there were two beds. Buffy went straight to the window and opened it.

"You're not cold are you?"

"No. I just …it don't matter." She says. "What bed do you want?"

"Don't mind. You pick."

"Buffy when for the one closes the window.

"Well we should get some sleep. I'll let you use the bath room first." She nods and goes to the bathroom. She flicks the light on the looks around. Her heart started to beat after so she got in there a washed before coming out again and getting into bed. As they had no other clothes she slept in her day clothes, which was very uncomfortable.

Connor next went into the bathroom and then when he came out he saw Buffy was asleep. Looking at her in the dim light of the room he saw her beautiful skin, golden hair and the dark bruise cover almost half her face. Whatever made that must of really hurt and the way she was acting it didn't just hurt her physically.

Connor climbed into bed, he hoped he was going to fall asleep quickly but he didn't at all. In the might he heard Buffy mumbling things in her sleep, which scared him.

"Stop, please! Why are you doing this?"

The mumbles weren't clear so it took him some time to figure out what she was saying. He tried to wake her but she punched him in the face so now Connor was sitting on his bed just watching her.

Over in the hotel Angel was walking around his room. He couldn't sit still or even try and sleep as dawn was coming.

Was he right for being mad at Buffy? The things he said to her were harsh and he didn't even know how she got hurt. The anger made his brain shut off and let Angelus come out a little.

Then on the other hand he keeping thing that he was right to be mad as she was having sex with Spike. Of all the people she could have had she went to him. Angel left her so she could have someone to take her out in the sun but she goes to another vampire.

Angel didn't know what to do. Buffy was hurt so much and he said hurtful words to her. Seeing the sorrow in her eyes and the bruises on her face made his heart hurt.

He wanted to be there for her and comfort her but at the same time his demon was roaring with rage as she had slept with his childe and he was mad that Spike had touched what was his.

The sun was coming up when Buffy opened her eyes. She was looking out of the window. She didn't move or make a noise. She just looked at the brightening sky.

"Morning. You okay?" Connor asked her; although he didn't see her face he knew she was awake by the way that her breathing had changed.

Buffy rolled over and looked at him.

She looked at the boy and could see Angel in him, also a little bit of Darla.

"So Angel is your father, who's your mother?" Buffy asked him ignoring his question. She didn't want to lie to him and say she was fine because she really wasn't.

"Darla." Connor says. "Know her?" He smiles at her.

Buffy eyes were wide in shock.

"Know her? She might have tried killing me and bit my mother."

"I'll take that as a yes."

"I thought she was dead?"

"She was but she came back, I don't really know the whole story."

"How old are you." Buffy wanted to know when Darla and Angel had got back together.

"16."

"No, I mean what year were you born?"

"Oh, a few months ago."

"Oh, you're younger then my sister." She says climbing out of bed and walking to the bathroom, before she closes the door she adds, "You two could make a strange couple."

Under Connor's breath he said, "I would prefer you." Lucky for him that Buffy's was so hurt at the moment that her slayer senses weren't working to well.

Connor thinks about what she said and was wondering. When Buffy came out the bathroom her hair was wet as she had a shower.

"What did you mean about me and your sister?" he asked as he saw Buffy drying her hair.

"Dawn, she was created by monks, she use to be the key but they transformed her into a human, my sister. She was 'born', I guess, last year. But like you she is a teenager."

"Right so me being this ages doesn't surprise you?" Buffy shakes her head no. "What do you want to do now?" he asked Buffy as she had finished doing her hair.

"I'm going to head back to Sunnydale. You guys don't need me hanging around."

"I'm not happy with you going back there. Look what happened to you there."

"I can handle it."

"With them bruises I find it hard to believe you." He was getting worried, if Buffy when back to Sunnydale what would stop that person that did this to her from attacking again.

"Look kid I'm the slayer. I have been killing vampire for a long time now. I know what I'm doing."

"So what did happen to you if you know what to do?" He stepped closer to her. She looked up into his brown eyes that looked so much like this fathers.

"It doesn't matter." She walks away and stands by the window again.

"So it's true. What my dad said. Your boyfriend gave it to you rough?" Buffy hated it when that was said. Neither of them knew what happen happened.

"It wasn't like that." She says quietly. There were tears in her eyes from the memories forming.

Buffy was on the floor of the bathroom under Spike. She was screaming for him to get off but nothing seemed to get through to him. She pushed him away but he kept her pinned to the floor, the pain in her body was making her vision blurry. He had punched her a few times in the face, hard then he usually does. He also kept kissing her neck and lips painful. When she started screaming around through her raw throat he moved his hands to her neck and tightened his grip. He wanted her to shut and just give into him. Buffy's heart was racing, her breath leaving her lungs and her conscious slipping away, so with one last kick she got him off her. Taking in a deep breath and pushed herself up. She pulled her torn robe to her battered body.

"As me again why I could never love you?"

"Buffy, my god, I didn't-" Spike looks at her and saw the damage he had created over her once gorgeous body.  
"Because I stopped you. Something I should have done a long time ago." She says angry. She was amazed she could say anything. Everything that was going through her head at that moment was too confusing.

Spike quickly walked out the bathroom in shame. How could he of done that? He almost violated the women he loved.

Buffy waited till she heard the front door slam before she fell to the floor in pain and despair.

Her body throbbed with pain, so much pain she could even move to get clean and changed. She just sat on the bathroom floor crying for what seemed like years but was only a few minutes. When her tears had dried enough for her to see, she moved her robe off her leg and saw a bruise forming. If there was a bruise there where it didn't hurt that much she didn't want to look in the mirror. The bruised forming on her face, chest and arms where stinging. She felt the blood rushing through her body as her heart was still pumping in fear.

Then there was another slam of the front door. Buffy froze where she was. Then she heard Xander's voice and let out a sigh of relief.

"Buffy?" Connor said load enough to bring her out of the horrible memory of the even that happened in her own bathroom no more than two days ago.

Buffy looked at him, Connor was shocked at what he saw. Her checks were soaked with tears. ""Buffy. Tell me what happened. I'm here for you."

She couldn't keep it hidden any long, "he hurt me."

"Who?"

"Spike. I'm was going out with him but I called it off. He didn't like it so he tried to… he, tried making me-" she broke off in sobs and Connor wrapped his arms around her. Buffy accept, as they felt safe and comforting. She hadn't let Xander, Willow or Dawn comfort her, they didn't know what happened but they could guess.

Buffy had her head resting on his chest while his head was on hers. They went to the bed and sat down. Buffy cried into him till there was no more.

"When did this happen." Connor asked when her breathing was better.

"The day before I came here. I didn't want to be there when he was."

"Is he still there?" Connor was mad at Spike and he didn't even know him. He knew of him by his father's anger towards him but that was it.

"I don't know. I think so." Connor got up and walked to the down. "What are you doing?"

"I'm going to kill that bastard for hurting you."

"Connor, please just, don't. Go back to the hotel and get on with your life."

"Buffy what he did, or even tried to do is wrong."

"I know but please, please don't tell Angel. If he knew everything would be worse."

Seeing the fear in her eyes made him agree to not doing anything.

After a little while long they left the hotel and then went to get something to eat.

When they were eating Buffy just looked at her plant of food, while Connor was looking at her.

He could see people walking past looking at Buffy; to them she probably looked like a weak wife to an abusive ass. But Connor could see the strength in her. She was almost glowing with it.

"Buffy, what are we going to do now?"

"I don't know. I guess you will go back to helping Angel or whatever it is you do and I'll go back to my friends and save the world again." She wasn't happy that was obvious but Connor could tell that there was more bothering her.

"Is it my dad?" Buffy looked at him.

"What do you-"

"Come on Buffy I have heard about you two. And him saying that to you…. It wasn't what you deserve."

"Yes it is." She replies quietly.

"No. You deserve a lot more then that baby."

He called her baby. That, for Buffy, felt strange. He was Angel's son and was calling her Baby. She didn't say anything because even though it wasn't what felt right it felt nice to have someone care.

They sat there eating the rest of their food in silence.

Connor was thinking about the beautiful women in front of him and couldn't believe Angel had left her. While on the other hand Buffy was thinking about what was going to happen when she got back to Sunnydale. The group would be asking her question, Dawn will use this as another distraction and then there was Spike. She couldn't face him. When she thought about him she would be brought to tears and right away as she was thinking about this a single, warm tear feel from her eye; rolled down her check slowly to drop of her face onto her hand.


	2. Chapter 2

A day or two passed and Buffy decided it was time she went back to Sunnydale. Her wounds had heals some and she felt a little better.

She didn't know why Connor was acting the way he was but she knew she liked the comfort.

Buffy went back to the hotel and said good-bye to everyone hoping she would see Angel and she did.

"I thought I would tell you I'm going back to Sunnydale. I'm sorry, really I am." Buffy said and then went to walk out but Angel stopped her.

"I'm sorry for over reacting. It was and still is a shock." Angel felt bad about how he reacted.

"Don't matter. Bye."

Buffy tries to leave again but Angel stops her.

"Buffy, please. What I said to you was wrong. I don't know what happened and I spoke when I shouldn't have. I'm sure you have a reason for being with him and-" Angel was cut off by Buffy.

"Don't please, I just need to go. Forget about everything that happened." With that she walked out of the hotel and Angel was left standing there looking at the door closing.

Connor walked to him and said, "You really hurt her with what you said to her."

"I know Connor." Angel replied frustrated.

"You don't know the half of it." Connor tried walking away but heard Angel call him back,

"Connor what happened? Did she tell you?" Connor nodded. "Tell me, please?"

Connor looked at him for a while then slowly said, "When she came back from heaven she needed something, she slept with Spike and she felt a little bit more alive. That continued for a while then she called it off, her friends found out and then Spike slept with Anya…" Connor slowly stopped speaking, he had images of Buffy getting hurt in his mind and hated it.

"Then what?" Angel pushed on.

"Then, Spike when to say sorry but, in the end, he tried to make Buffy have sex with him. That's why she was so beaten up. Because the vampire that came from you siring of Drusilla tried to rape Buffy, in her own bathroom."

Connor looked at his father and then saw the pain in his eyes and the guilt. He was sort of glad that Angel was hurting as he did say things that were out of order.

Connor left Angel and went to his room in the hotel then he grabbed a bag and put as many clothes in it as possible then he jumped out of the window and headed to Sunnydale.

* * *

I'm sorry this sucked but i have lost the plot on this fic too. but i have one but its not very good now. so give me ideas on what ur like in reviews and ill try and work them into my fic. or u can send me a message asking me to add something. Up to you.

Hope u enjoyed this short chapter. also check out my other fics on ficionpress i am update alot more there recently and the fics are a romance.

www(.)fictionpress(.)com(/)~evilbuffyfan4eva (remove the brackets)


	3. Chapter 3

AN: in advance im sorry for mistakes, i know they are there but i find it hard enough to write it once i dont want to check it over and over again. if u would prefer there to be no mistakes then i'll sort it, i will stop writing. for those who like my fic im sure u can understand i am not into write these anymore and im only doing it for u and im sure u can look past the misakes for the story line. so thank you for reading and i hope you enjoy it. also if i make a mistake with small details into the plot again i am sorry.

* * *

Buffy got back to Sunnydale and was outside her house but none of the lights were on even though it was night. She thought that someone would be home with Dawn, maybe Dawn was asleep, but it wasn't that late. Buffy went to the door and opened it then walked into the darkness. "Hello?" She called but no one answered. She couldn't decide whether that was good or bad. She wanted to be alone for a while, as she would have to explain everything to the gang. But then again she wanted to know where they were just in case someone was hurt. She looked around the house and saw the dishes hadn't been done so knew that they had been there a few houses before.

She saw her cell on the side and picked it up. "9 miss calls and 5 messages." Was showing on the screen. They were all from Willow, Xander or Dawn obviously not realizing she had left her phone in Sunnydale.

She got her cell and put it in her pocket then headed out the door. She got outside and she noticed how cold it was compared to the warmth inside.

She made her way along the path, she let her feet her take her where ever they wanted but it ended up she was at the magic box. She stopped at the door and took a deep breath.

The bell rang and the Scooby gang turned their heads to see who came through the door.

"Buffy." Willow said getting up and walking to her quickly. She pulled Buffy into a hug and even though it hurt Buffy didn't let on. The rest of the people followed and smiled at Buffy. The bruise on her face had faded but was still slightly visible and she noticed that the Scooby gang was looking at it.

"Buffy? You okay?" Dawn asked taking Buffy's arm in her arm.

"Yeah I'm fine." Buffy said kind if dazed, something didn't feel right.

"Where did you go? Why?" Dawn asked more question.

"Dawn, stop with the questions." Xander said calmly, "Let Buffy tell us when she is ready." He then started to lead them back to the table.

Buffy walked with them but with each step she felt more and more uncomfortable. She walked slower but the rest had already sat down. She then sat with them but kept looking around.

"Buffy what's wrong? What are you looking for?" Willow asked.

"Nothing." Buffy said quickly.

"What happened? Why did you go without telling us? It reminded me of the time we were in college." Willow said sadly.

"I had to get away. Something happened-" Buffy started but she was cut off. The training door opened.

Buffy watched it. No one would be in there that they knew as Willow and Dawn were next to her then next to Willow was Xander was next to Dawn while Anya was sitting on the stairs and Giles was in England.

She eyes followed the door and everything seemed to be in slow motion. She saw a black coat and then bleached hair, Spike. He was walking through the door and was looking at her.

"Buffy, your back. We were worried about you."

Xander looks at him annoyed while Anya looks away from him. Willow and Dawn stayed quiet. While they all had their own reactions Buffy had her own. If the group were watching her they would have seen her eyes widen in fear.

"Go away Spike you're not welcome here." Xander said. But Spike didn't listen and started walking closet to the table where they sat.

"And who's going to throw me out? Will you?" he looked Xander deep in the eyes and they both knew Spike could stop him if he wanted to. "What about you, Red? Got a spell to throw me out?"

"I do actually."

Willow stood up and went to do the spell but Spike quickly said, "Hold on now, Buffy doesn't want me gone do you."

Spike looked at Buffy who turned her head away from him.

"Buffy? Answer, yes or no do you want me gone?"

Buffy knew that she could take him but was too scared to test it. "No." She said just loud enough for the group to hear.

"Buy Buffy-" Xander started but Spike cut in.

"Ah ah ah slayer has spoken." Spike says with a smug face.

Xander lost his temper and walked out the magic box.

"Xander can you take me home?" Dawn asked.

"Sure. Come on." He said and then waited for Dawn to get her coat then walked out of the shop.

"Well," Anya said in a bright voice. I'm going to go sort some stuff out…in the basement." She then walked off, wanting to get out of the tense atmosphere.

"So, I think I might head home as well. Buffy you coming?"

"No, she wants us to train. Come on." Spike said without saying anything to Buffy for her looking at him.

"But-" Willow starts.

"Look at her, she is bruised, she needs more trainer. Come on Buffy." Spike said getting closer to Buffy. She got up and started to walk to the training room trying to stay away from Spike but he walked behind her and put his arm on her shoulder close to her neck and tightly squeezed. Spike felt but Willow didn't see, but Buffy flinched.

"Okay, I'll see you at home Buffy?" Willow asked but didn't get an answer. The door to the training room slammed shut. She walked to the basement door and shouted down to Anya goodbye.

In the training room Buffy walked in and tried to get away from Spike but his grip tighten and pulled her to him.

"Spike let me go please." Buffy said close to tears.

"Where did you go? Angel? What did you say?" Spike said his face inches away from her. He was so different, why was he like this? What had changed since when they were sleeping together to now apart from her leaving him? When he tried to…when he was in the bathroom it was obvious he wouldn't stop but while Buffy was away she was hoping he had seen sense and realized he was wrong. But now it looked like he was angrier and still wanted her as bad but was more willing to do whatever it was to get her.

"You think you can get away from me? You use me for months and then you expect me to let you go. You still want me, I know it." Spike had pushed Buffy into a wall and was pressing against her.

"Spike please, I couldn't do that anymore. I, I, I don't know but please, don't?" Buffy had tears rolling down her cheeks. She couldn't think of anything apart from what happened in the bathroom. His hands where on her. She remembered his fingers digging into her skin bruising her. His lips on hers, his tongue forcing it's way into her mouth. He was pinning her down, just like he was at this moment against the wall.

"Spike please stop!" she said the same words as the first time he did this to her.

"I'm not doing anything Buffy."

"You are, you did. You tried-" Spike kissed her deeply and she struggled to get away. He then stopped and throw her on the floor. He walked to her and leaned over but she kicked him then got up and went to the door. He grabbed her as she pulled the door open.

"Buffy, Buffy tell me. Where did you go?" Spike asked over and over but Buffy wouldn't say.

"ANYA!" Buffy screamed but from the fear and her crying her scream wasn't that loud.

Then Spike's weight was gone from her. She closed her eyes and curled up in a ball.

"Buffy?" She her Connor say her name. He slowly walked to her and laid his hand gently on her arm. "Buffy? It's me. You okay?" She didn't flitch at his touch. He then lifted her up a little and pulled her to him. She gladly took his comfort. He was stroking her hair and let her sob into his chest.

"It's okay. His gone." Connor whispered to her.

Outside Angel was holding tightly onto Spike. He was fighter but Angel punched him and knocked him out.

Angel looked in through a window and saw his son holding the love of his life, his only love. He turned away and dragged Spike with him. On the way to the cemetery Spike woke up.

"Hey, let go of me." Spike demanded.

"Like you let go of Buffy? You make me sick." Angel screamed back throwing him against a wall. He pinned him to it and shouted in his face, "Why did you hurt her? You worthless thing, you said you loved her, you lied. If you did you wouldn't be able to hurt her that much."

"She used me." Spike shouted back but Angel punched him in the face, then the stomach and then the back of the head, knocking him onto the floor.

"Don't say anything." Angel then pulled him up and continued to the graveyard, then throw him into a crypt.

In the magic box Connor was still holding the sobbing Buffy. Anya then came into the room. "Who are you?" She asked but Connor just held Buffy and rocked her.

"Buffy? What's wrong?" Anya asked but had no reply. "Come on, whoever you are. Let's get her to her house."

Connor nodded and picked her up. She wrapped her arms around him tightly and Anya led the way to her house. When there they entered and Willow, Xander and Dawn were on the sofa talking about what was happening, if anything, between Buffy and Spike still.

When they saw Buffy in Connors arms they jumped up and went to her.

"Oh my God. What happened?" Xander asked.

"Where can I put her?" Connor asked.

Willow led him to Buffy's room then watched as Connor put her down. She clung to him and wouldn't let go. "Please don't leave me." She asked in a whisper.

Connor was kneeling next to her bed.

"Of course I won't. I'm here for you." He said then Buffy leaned her head against him.


	4. Chapter 4

**IMPORTANT AN: the AN at the bottom is very important please read as it depends on what story i continue to write.**

Also sorry if this isn't as good as other chapters and about the mistakes, enjoy.

* * *

After a while Buffy fell asleep so Connor moved away from her and left the room after checking the window was locked.

"So who are you?" Dawn asked.

"Connor. Angel's son."

As Connor said that everyone sort of relaxed around him like that fact sorted everything out.

"What you doing here?" Xander asked as he had waited at the Summer's house when he brought Dawn home then Willow was telling him about what had happened after he had left.

"I'm protecting Buffy." Connor said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"From what? Spike?" Willow asked. Connor nodded. "Is that where Buffy was for the last few days? With Angel and then she came back and Angel sent you to look after Buffy?"

"Angel doesn't know that I'm here. Well he might know now but I didn't tell him I was coming." Connor explained.

"Why isn't Angel here 'protecting' her? And what did Spike do." Tara asked.

"Angel doesn't love her I guess, and Spike. Her hurt her."

"We got that much, what did he do?" Dawn snapped.

"Who are you?" Connor asked her looking at her in disgust.

"Dawn, Buffy's sister!" Dawn replied also snapping. Connor and Dawn had seemed to already created a relationship, where they hate each other.

Connor sat down and explained what had happened between Spike and Buffy then what had happened when Buffy got to L.A then what had happened in the magic box.

The group wanted to kill Spike, Willow felt terrible for leaving Buffy alone with Spike.

"I should have stayed." Willow said. Connor agreed, he felt like Buffy's friends should have done more to help her and been there for her.

"You couldn't have done anything if you stayed." Xander comforted her.

While the group spoke to Connor Angel too Spike to the graveyard. Angel was so mad and disgusted by him he could have easily staked him there and then but knew that he shouldn't.

"So Spike. You hurt the women I love. The women you apparently love. How could you do it?" Angel kicked Spike in the stomach making him fall to the ground.

"She used me." Spike kept saying this but seemed like no one understood how much this hurt him.

"She came back from the dead, she was in heaven and was then made to live on this earth. She couldn't hope. She turned to you, I wish she was about to touch to me but she couldn't."

"And wouldn't." Spike grinned. "Face it, she preferred me over you, even though you two can't do anything doesn't mean she couldn't have gone to you." Spike grinned. "She doesn't want you anymore."

"Maybe, but she doesn't want you either." Angel said punching him in the face making Spike's nose bleed.

"What did you did to her, no one deserves that." Angel could feel the urge to stake him now but still held back but instead he punched, kick and even bite Spike. When Angel was done he left Spike on the floor, he got his breath back then found some chains and chained him up so he was unable to move. Leaving Spike there Angel headed for Buffy's house to check on her.

When he was there he climbed up onto the roof and looked through Buffy's window. He watched her sleeping. She was rest and so beautiful.

He stayed there for a few minutes then he saw Connor walk into the room then sat next to Buffy on the floor and sat stroking her head while she slept. With his vampire hearing he heart Connor whispers, "I love you Buffy."

AN: thanks for reading and I'm very sorry for the long time between updating but I have been having trouble with writing. I also can't leave a story unfinished that is why I keep adding more and more but slowly. But I have come to decide that I can only write one story at a time. So I have updated all my fics at the same time. In the reviews please tell me what fic you would want me to finish first. The one that gets the most people wanted it to be finished I will finish that first then I will finish the fic that came in 2nd place and so on til they are all done. If I feel like updating another fic though I will. But I think this is the best way of updating now as I am making rubbish chapters now. **The voting stops and I will count them on September 10****th**** 2010.**

Again thanks for reading and please review telling me what fic you want me to finish first!


	5. Chapter 5

Angel was in shock, his son had fallen for the same women he had. Angel was walking around Sunnydale trying to clear his head but nothing was helping. Angel didn't know how Connor was act towards Buffy, would he try and become her partner? Was he just going to leave when Buffy turns him down? Will Buffy turn him down?

Angel could feel the sun raising so headed to the graveyard and found a place to stay during the day.

In the morning Buffy woke up and found Connor sitting on the chair in her room, curled up asleep. She smiled a little; she did feel safer knowing he was there.

He got out of bed and went to the window. It was a funny day, she actually felt a little warmer then she had the last few days. Buffy turned around and looked at her clock, it was coming close to 10am. She went to her door but looked back at Connor, should she leave him alone here or wake him up?

From the look of him he needed sleep so Buffy decided to leave the room and let Connor rest.

She walked downstairs and found Dawn, Willow and Tara on the sofa watching the T.V.

"Morning." Buffy said a little shaky. Her memory from last night was 100% so she wasn't sure what was going on.

"Buffy! You okay?" Dawn asked.

"Yeah, how did I get to my room?" Buffy asked wondering.

"Ermm, Connor took you up there. Where is he?" Dawn asked.

"His asleep, he looked tired." Buffy said looking at the three of them.

"His been watching over you all night. I guess he fell asleep when the sun started to rise." Tara added.

"Bless." Buffy thought for a while, Connor watched over her but Angel wasn't? At this Buffy felt hurt but also comforted at the same time.

"I'm going to get something to eat." And she then walked off to the kitchen leaving the three girls to look at each other not knowing what to do.

A while after Buffy had eaten she sat in the living room and tried to watch the T.V but images from the night were coming back. The last few days had been so messed up.

"BUFFY!"

Buffy looked up at the ceiling then stood up and went to the bottom of the stairs to see Connor rushing down them.

"Hey, you okay?" Buffy said seeing Connor panicking.

Instead of answering Connor through his arms around Buffy holding her tight to him.

For a second Buffy closed her eyes and enjoyed and warm comfort from someone.

"I thought something had happened." Connor said letting go of her, his chest heaving for breath.

Buffy looked at into his eyes, "I'm fine, I woke up and came down here, I was going to wake up but you looked tired."

Connor nodded understanding.

"Want some food?" Buffy then asked.

"No, thanks. I think I'm going to go to the graveyard to see if I can find Spike." At his name Buffy shuddered a little bit. "Sorry." Connor said, as he saw her reaction."

"For what?" Buffy asked confused.

"Say his name."

"Can't go without saying it. What's happen has happened, can't change that."

"True, but I will make him pay." With that Connor marched out the house.

Even though Buffy wanted to make sure Connor was going to be okay she couldn't handle seeing Spike for a while.

Back in the graveyard, Angel was pacing in a crypt, thinking, wondering of what could happen with Buffy and Connor. If Connor wants to be with Buffy then the state she is in at the moment could mean that she would let herself go with Connor.

"She wouldn't." Angel says to himself. "Then again, she went with Spike, but she was needy, she still is, she might regret what happens, if something does happen."

He kept thinking of this until he heard a noise at the door.

"Scared she'll like me more then she likes you?"

"She won't" Angel said turning to the door seeing Connor there. "Where is she?" He demanded to know.

"With her friends, she's safe during the day."

"Why are you here?" Angel was staring at his son. He was in the sun that was coming through the door now that Connor had opened it. Angel was staying deep in the shadow.

"I came to see if Spike was here."

"You don't need to worry about him, I've taken care of it."

"So his dead?"

Angel didn't answer, he wasn't but Angel knew he was going to let Buffy do that when she was ready.

"I said I've taken care of it."

"When I find him his dead." Connor said turning to leave.

"You love her?" Angel asked.

Connor stopped but didn't turn around.

"Answer me, is that why you're here? Because you have falling with love with Buffy?"

"Yes." Connor answered. He then slowly turned around and saw something in Angel's eyes. Something between hate, jealously and pain. "You know why, you love her too, you understand what it is about her that makes you loose any control to think straight."

Angel looked away now.

"She doesn't want you anymore. Just let whatever is going to happen, happen."

"But she won't feel the same about you-" Angel said looking back up but stopped when he saw that Connor was gone.

Angel needed the sun to go down, to make sure Connor didn't kill Spike.

A few minutes after running through the graveyard Connor went into another crypt. There he was, Spike.

"Aww, look at you, helpless." Connor kicked him in the face. "Lets see how you like not being to fight back."

AN: I know this isn't the fic that I'm meant to update but I felt like writing this one. I'll so one chapter for each other fic then I will stick to the one fic that won the vote.

I hope you liked this chapter.


	6. Chapter 6

AN: i hope you enjoy this, sorry for the wait. =D

* * *

"Do you think he will kill…?" Dawn asked cutting off just before saying Spike's name.

"I don't know." Replied Buffy, strangely she was hoping Connor would have more self-control and not kill Spike, even after what Buffy had gone through.

"Do you want us to go find him?" Willow looks at Buffy. She was biting her lip thinking. "Buffy?"

"Oh, erm, no I don't think he'll listen to anyone."

"He'd listen to you." Dawn says looking at Buffy. They all saw the affection Connor had for Buffy.

"His just being nice." Buffy says trying to convince herself that there was nothing more then friendship between her and Connor. "But I'll go find it. You lot just stay here."

"Take your phone and contact us in 20 minutes." Dawn demanded and Buffy nodded.

In the graveyard Connor had kicked and punched Spike so much his face had become swollen and blood covered most of his skin. Spike was still chained up so was unable to move or block the attack that well.

"You bastard! How could you do that! Don't you realize how much you hurt her? Do you care?" He screamed as he punched Spike.

"You think she is all beauty?" Spike managed to say in a pained voice as his ribs had been smashed so much. "Think she is the little prefect slayer? All strong and powerful?" He watches Connors face. "You have no idea what the real Buffy is like. She will use you; pretend you don't matter as long as she feels better in herself. She'll play games with you and always, and I mean always, she will kick you when you're down."

Connor stopped hitting Spike while he spoke, but he didn't believe a single word of what was being said.

"You are a vampire, you deserve her kicking you while your down, I don't know what she didn't just kill you." As he said this he pulled out a stake. He wasn't sure if he would kill Spike or not all he knew was that he enjoyed the fear that showed in his eyes when the stake appeared.

In a rushed walked Buffy made her way to the graveyard. Her heart from pounding from the fear she may see Spike. She didn't want to be around him but couldn't let him get killed. She got to the graveyard and walked even faster, she then bumped into Connor close to the crypt Spike was in.

"Hey, you okay? What's wrong?" Connor asked. Holding her by the arms looking into her eyes.

Buffy eye's wondered to Connors hands and saw the blood over them. "What did you do?" Buffy asked quietly.

"Don't worry about it." Connor said and started to lead her away from the graveyard.

Buffy felt sick in her stomach at the thought of Spike being dusted, he had hurt her yes but they had a history and for some reason Buffy just wasn't ready to see that go, even after what she went through. Connor kept moving her through the graveyard, then as they got closer to one crypt Buffy felt Angel close. Was he here? Did he follow her home as well? What was going on?

They got home and Buffy ran upstairs leaving Connor in the hall. She went to the bathroom shutting the doors and throw up into the toilet.

She sat on the floor for a while then she heard Connor at the door. "Buffy you okay?"

She looked up and didn't know what to do. She needed to know if Angel was here, if Spike was undead. How could she find out? She had a feeling that Connor wouldn't tell her and he wouldn't let her out to the graveyard on her own. What was she meant to do?

"I'm fine, can you get Willow?" Buffy asked.

A few minutes later there was another knock at the door. "Buffy it's me." Willow said. Suddenly she was pulled through the door and saw Buffy slightly shaking.

"Buffy you okay?" She asked extremely concern.

"Yeah, it's just kind of hard being in here." She said looking away from Willow's eyes in shame.

"It's okay. Want to go to my room?" Buffy quickly shook her head.

Then in a whisper she said, "I need you to go to the graveyard. There's two crypts, I need you to go into both of them, and tell me what you find."

"Buffy I don't understand."

"Just do it please? Take Xander but make sure Dawn and Connor stay here."

Willow agrees, Buffy then tells her what crypts she needed to look at. Willow then went downstairs and told Connor that Buffy wanted to see him in her room.

As Connor went upstairs Willow told Xander that they had to pop out, she told Dawn that they went to the magic box so if Connor asks she would be able to tell him.

Connor got to Buffy's room and saw her on her bed. "Willow said you wanted to talk."

"What'd you do to Spike?" she asked.

"Buffy don't worry about him." Connor said.

"I need to know, I need to know if his out there or not."

"You don't have to think of him anymore."

Buffy looked in shock. He was wrong? Connor actually did it?

Buffy slowly felt tears running down her face and fell into her bed into a quiet cry. At this moment in time Connor had no idea what to do. He was unsure if he should hold her or leave her.

After a while Buffy told him to go downstairs and that she needed to be on her own.

Connor went downstairs and started to talk to Dawn, which ended fast and they just watched a film on the T.V.

Willow and Xander quickly make their way through the graveyard and got to the first crypt. They went in and to their surprise they saw Angel.

"Willow, Xander, is Buffy okay?" He asked moving to them quickly.

"She's fine. Well I mean she's coping." Willow told him.

"Is Connor still with her?"

"Yeah, at the house. What's his deal with Buffy?" Xander asked.

"I think he loves her."

"Like father like son eh?"

Angel looked at him giving him a dark look.

"Angel, she is fine, do you know if Spike is a live?"

"I don't know. Connor went after him." Angel was still pacing.

"We need to find him, will you be okay here?"

Angel nodded then added, "I left him a live for Buffy to finish him off when she wants, let me know if Connor killed him?"

Willow and Xander nod and hen run out of the crypt hoping to find Spike.


	7. Chapter 7

When they get to the crypt they find Spike. Barely a live though. He was hurt badly but not killed. Thankfully Buffy would still be able to do that herself.

Willow and Xander move him so he is laying on his back, obviously still chained up. Willow then looked to see if he was awake and he was.

"Spike? Connor do this to you?" Willow asks.

Spike nods.

"Will you live?" Xander asks.

Spike grunts as he moves but nods again.

"Can lets leave him now." Xander says but Willow stops him walking away. "Willow he hurt Buffy. Just leave him there, he'll heal."

"We can't leave him here. Connor will come back."

"No he won't." Spike said. "He doesn't want to kill me. He wants to hurt me. His coming back to do more of this to me when I have healed." Spike says, not looking at all happy about this. "I wish he killed me."

Willow looks at Spike then Xander. "How long do you think it will be before Connor comes back for another round of kick the Spike?"

"Willow. Please stop him? Help me?" Spike basically begs the witch.

"After what you have done to Buffy. No way. I don't want you dead only so Buffy can have the satisfaction that she ended your worthless existence." Willow says, angry at Spike for he has hurt her best friend.

"The witch is becoming scary. It's a nice look for you Red."

Willow looks at Spike who is just lying on the floor, not moving only talking.

"Okay, we can leave him. Just need to make sure we come back before Connor. Maybe we should move him to another crypt so Connor doesn't know where he is."

"Okay, we'll do it at nightfall tonight." Xander says and they walk out the crypt and head back home after telling Angel that Spike was a live but badly hurt.

Willow goes upstairs, seeing Connor and Dawn were in the living room having an argument.

"Buffy?" Willow asks and Buffy lifts her head up from her pillow. "His alive."

"Oh thank god." Buffy says sighing. "What about the other crypt?"

"Angel is there. He left Spike a live in the crypt for you to finish when you wanted. But Connor got in the way. Spike is really badly hurt."

"Why is Angel here?" Buffy asks.

"Buffy he loves you. He only wants to help." Willow says. She knew Angel would always love Buffy and Buffy would always love him. Anyone that didn't know that was blind as this love. The love that was so forbidden was so strong you would be able to feeling it whenever you around Buffy and Angel at the same time.

Downstairs Xander goes into the living room and watches Dawn yelling at Connor about something to do with popcorn.

"Hey kids, can I interrupt?" Xander spoke over her. They then both looked at him, rather annoyed at the interruption. "Where is the popcorn?"

"Over there." Dawn says pointing to the table. Xander grabs it, sits down and puts on the T.V turning the volume up so he could hear over the two teenagers argument.

"Well you need to grow up and accept you can't always have what you want."

"We could of split the popcorn and put two different toppings on."

"That just means more effort for some food that will be eaten within a few minutes."

"This is my house so I'll so what I want with my food." Dawn yells."

"Hey, trying to watch here." Xander says.

Connor looks at him then wonders where Willow had gone. He walks upstairs and from the hall he hears Willow saying to Buffy Angel loves her.

"No he doesn't." He says walking into the room. "Remember what he said to you? He was out of order and doesn't care about you Buffy. Only I care about her."

"Oh Connor shut up. You're just a spoilt little kid." Willow flips at him. "Stop telling Buffy what you think and let her work out everything in her own time."

Connor looks at her, looking rather angry indeed.

"I do care about Buffy, I'm willing to help her, which is more then you lot did. More then Angel did. I'm the one that's here for Buffy and I only want to see that she is okay. If it was up to you and your other friends she would be in this room suffering on her own, none of you bothering to find out what's wrong. That's what lead her to Spike in the first place." Connor says and he knew he had stuck a nerves bringing up the fact Buffy had to go to Spike for any comfort after coming back from the dead.

"Connor, please. I know you're trying to help me but it's too much. I love my friends and they help me all the time. Thank you for helping but I will be fine now. You can go back to your life now."

Connor looks at Buffy completely shocked and hurting. She wanted him gone when he had helped her and looked after her and now she just wanted him to go. Not knowing what to do Connor storms out of the house and heads back to the graveyard to find Angel.

"Why you?" He yells at his father. "Why does she accept your help when you have hurt her just as much as any other demon. Why does she go to her friend instead of me? I helped her when she needed it. Her friends didn't they left her to go find comfort in Spike's arms." Connor walks back and forth in the crypt, while Angel watches him.

"The thing about Buffy. You need to know when to help and let her work it out on her own." Angel says calmly. "She will never ask for it but she may need it sometimes. Like when you went and helped her. She was glad of your help until she didn't need it anymore. Then you got in the way. She does things her way, she is the slayer. No one will tell her what to do unless she wants it that way." Angel sits calmly explaining. He knew Buffy, he understood her.

"Why leave her?" Connor asks completely shocked that he was able to now knowing her for real.

"I had to. It was either leave her and be apart or be together and kill each other. I would rather be able to watch her from the shades and know I am unable to be with her more then being together and know sooner or later I will be trying to kill her." Angel thinks back to the time he lost his soul. Angelus wanted Buffy dead. Wanting her blood in his veins. He never wanted to feel that again from Angelus' point of view. But as Angel, he always wanted her blood. Her blood her love her body, soul and everything. She was his everything.

Connor and Angel sit in the crypt together. In silences. Bith thinking of the women that they both had feelings for but for them both knew she wouldn't be with them. She didn't love Connor and she had an forbidden love with Angel.

They both knew they would have to live there life with the pain of loving someone untouchable. Angel only hoped that Connor would move on and wouldn't feel what he did. But he knew that once you love Buffy nothing will be the same in your life again.

Sun started to set. Connor noticed this and decided to go to Spike to see how he was doing and when he would be able to start his little torture games again.

"Connor, leave him." Angel said but Connor didn't listen to his dad. He went to the crypt and saw Spike was looking better. He went to Spike and punched him around the face and in the gut a few times. When he was able to punch him one more time, to knock Spike out, his hand was grab from behind. He saw Angel gripping his hand. He was then thrown into a fall and fell to the floor. Above him stood Angel.

"Leave him again."

Connor had always loved to show his strength to his father, now he would be able to again.

* * *

AN: I know it sucked bad nights sleep and not to sure where to go with this fic atm so hopefully next chapter will be better.


	8. Chapter 8

Hey can you please review and tell me something you want to see thin this fic. My first story line i had i have chosen not to use as i don't like it. So give me an idea and i will try and put it into the fic. This can be from a tiny one line you want in it or the full story line. =]

* * *

Connor jumped to his feet and stood ready to block his fathers attacks. Angel watched knowing he would not hurt Connor unless it was self-defence.

Connor went to punch Angel a few times but Angel blocked all of them and knocked Connor back a few paces.

"Stop this Connor. Grow up." Angel says above him.

"You're protecting the guy that tried to rape Buffy. How can you even look at him let alone help him. What if she was hurt more when he tried to…? What if she couldn't of fought him off." Connor screams back at Angel, standing with tears in his eyes.

"I know what you're feeling. I am too. I hate him and deep down I know it's my fault she got hurt, for many reasons. I sired Drusilla who created Spike. I should have been here to help her. I wasn't. When she most needs me I leave her." Angel says, knowing his words are true. He never wanted to leave. His heart was here and they say home is where the heart is.

"You know your mistakes and you never tried to put them right." Connor stood slowly, watching for every move his father made. He stayed close to the wall. "Put them right now. Kill him so he can't hurt her again. So she is safe and doesn't have to look into the face that hurt her and tried forcing her to-"

"Don't say it!" Angel screamed. Images flashed in his mind of Buffy scream for Spike to stop.

Angel looked to Spike. He was getting more energy back but still wasn't moving.

While Angel looked away Connor took his chance and knocked his father to the floor. Connor bent down grabbing Angel with one hand and punched him with the other.

"Stop it." says a voice from the doorway.

Connor stopped in mid punch.

They both look at the door and see Buffy with Willow and Xander.

"Get off him Connor." She says and straight away Connor follows her orders. Angel gets up and dusts himself off. "Both of you go to my house." She says not looking either in the eye.

No one moves. "Now!" She says and Connor walks towards her and then moves past her and goes to the house. Angel slowly follows but stops next to Buffy, she just tenses up and steps away from him.

Angel felt pain strike his heart and he walked to the house, making sure he kept away from Connor.

"Buffy, why did you do that?" Willow asked from behind Buffy.

"You really think I need them to watching over me all the time, seeing me as a little girl that needs protecting?" Buffy looks at them and then to Spike who had not moved.

"Okay fair enough. I hope they don't fight each other at the house, can't afford more broken furniture." Willow smiles slightly.

Buffy slowly walks to Spike. Looking up and down him. He was hurt badly. "We need to move him. Get him out of here. So he can rest and heal. Somewhere where we know no one will get to him." Buffy says. "Xander, can you pick him up?"

"I'll try. Can't say I want to." He then moves over to Spike and grabs his coat. Throwing Spike's arm over his own shoulders and held his waist. "His heavy when his a dead weight." Xander smiles slightly. "Get it…dead weight? His dead."

"We got it Xander." Willow says. "So where we taking him?"

"Our basement." Buffy sighs.

"You sure?" Willow looks into Buffy's eyes. They all knew Connor and Angel wanted to see him dead.

"We can stop Connor and Angel getting to him if he is where we know and somewhere that is close to us."

"Okay, can we move? His getting heavy." Xander starts moving to the door, Willow leading the way. "Can someone help with going up the stairs."

Buffy sighs and grabs Spike's feet.

She has flashes of his face above her. Her body being grabbed by his hands. Her bathrobe ripping. She remembered the words he said and the determination in his eyes. He wanted her and she saw in his eyes he wasn't going to stop until he got what he wanted. She saw no emotion in his eyes.

Buffy drops his legs and shook her head trying to rid herself of the memories.

"You okay?" Xander asked seeing a sudden look of fear on Buffy's face.

"Yeah, sorry. Come on let's just get home." She grabs Spikes legs again and walks up the stairs. When out of the crypt Xander pulled Spike over his shoulder more so Buffy didn't have to help. They then walked to the house Willow opened the door. Xander dragged Spike into the house and down to the basement and left him on the floor there and then went to the group, who were in the living room, apart from Buffy. She went upstairs to her room after looking at Angel and Connor. They sat across from each other, watching, waiting for the other to make a move.

She got to her room, went to a small draw and opened it. She pulled out a top and a pair of boxers. Angel's. Buffy rarely wore them. She mostly would just hug and smell them but when she really needed to remember how she felt back when they first met. The rare love between them, how easy it was, she would wear them. Like now. She changed her clothes then went to her dressing table. Opening enough draw she pulled out a necklace. The cross Angel gave her when they first met and on that chain was the claddagh ring. She put both on and then climbed into bed hoping to sleep however she knew she would not feel safe now.

Spike was in the basement and where he has tried to hurt her was across the hall from her bedroom.

She curled up in a small ball and hugged her stuffed pig, Mr Gordo. She got to sleep and quickly fell into a dream. Again about her and Spike although things changed. Angel and Connor came into it. Looking after her. Surrounding her with love and caring about her. She was feeling suffocated from how nice they were being. Then Spike came back into the dream. The hurt and comfort from these three were confusing Buffy so much. She didn't know what she wanted from any of them.

Buffy tossed and turned in her sleep, while downstairs Connor had started to kick up about Spike being in the same house as Buffy. Angel made him sit down in the chair and stay there. Willow explained that this was what Buffy wanted and what she said would be done.

Angel looked up to where Buffy's room is. He could sense her. In a nightmare. Her walked upstairs and went to her room. He stood outside the door. He listened closely to hear her breathing. He heard her bed covers moving as she tossed and turned. Slowly he opened the door and moves in. He sits next to her and watches her.

Everyone downstairs left and went to their homes and went to sleep. Dawn made a bed up for Connor on the sofa but made it clear to stay away from Buffy's room.

It was after 3 in the morning and Angel was still watching Buffy. She was moving more and mumbling in her sleep. She then stopped and quietened down,

"We need to talk Angel." Buffy says rolling over to face him.

"About what?" Angel moves closer to her, kneeling on the floor by her bed.

"About everything that has happened since you left me."

Angel knew what she wanted. She wanted to know if they were still in love. Still willing to die for each other.

Angel stands up and sits on Buffy's bed, taking her hand in his. "Where do you want to start?"

* * *

AN: My niece is in a competition it would be amazing for her to win. Please copy and paste this link (removing the spaces) and then click "Tweet" and/or "Like" please. It'd help a lot!

http : / www . sunbeams . co . uk / gallery / detail / 70454f0a-fa3e-41b6-b501-d54f6b09029f


	9. Chapter 9

Angel was with Buffy and she wondered where to start.

"I don't know what to say, other then, what happened to us?" Buffy looked into his deep eyes and waiting an answer.

"We lost someone important to us and can never have it back." Angel thought for a moment. "We both wanted to move to, to pretend we could move on, but our heart knew better then our brains. Our hearts knew there was only ever one love for us."

"Why did we try to move on?" Buffy asked.

"I don't know. To forget what we felt, hoping we could have the life we once knew when it was simple?"

"When was your life ever simple? And when was mine ever simple!" Buffy sat up in bed.

"You know what I mean, we wanted to go back to the time where we were told we weren't allowed something. You never liked 'no' being said to you."

Buffy managed a smile.

"I do love you Buffy, I always have. In over 200 years no one has ever meant anything to me like you do."

"What about you and Cordelia?" Buffy felt her stomach flip as she asked this dreading the question.

"Nothing happened there, yes we have gotten closer since we left Sunnydale but I don't love her, I don't want her in any way. We're just friends. I promise."

Buffy takes a moment to take this in and then asks her next questions, "What about Darla?"

"It's a long story but I wasn't myself when I got back with her. And yes I was with her for many years but I never loved her, even Angelus didn't love her. Connor was meant to happen for a prophecy, that's why it happened. No other reason."

Buffy thought again. "I guess that's why his the age he is. Just like Dawn."

Angel nods in agreement.

"I wish we could go back in time and change what happened." Buffy wished.

"I know me to. But noting will be back the way it was"

Buffy looked back into Angel's eyes and remember the time they had first kissed. It was bitterly sweet, she wanted to be 16 once again. It was perfect. Then as she thought that she'd never be truly happy again Angel leans forward and pushes his lips against hers. Buffy returns the kiss and moans in pleasure. She lies down on the bed and Angel leans over her. Her hands hold his head and run up and down his back. the kiss got deeper and deeper until Angel was laying on the bed too and they only stopped for breath.

"What are you doing?"

Buffy and Angel looked towards the door to see a fire eyed Connor. "You can't do this. He left you. He let you get hurt ten hurt you again. I looked after you, why am I not good enough for you?" Connor shouts and storms off down the hall and the stairs.

Buffy swallowed hard. "I think that upset him."

Angel looked at her then to where his son was standing. "It's weird having my son have the hots for my love."

"Think we need to go after him or leave him to cool off?"

"Best to leave him for a while, when the boy is angry he never listens." Angel replied.

"Buffy what's going on?" Dawn asked standing at Buffy's door half asleep. But when she saw Angel on Buffy's bed holding her in his arms she suddenly woke up. "What's going on?" She asked urgently. "You Angelus?"

"No he isn't and don't worry just go back to bed." Buffy says hoping her sister was to tired to argue.

When Dawn had gone Buffy laid down again and asked Angel to stay with her that night.

"I'm always here."

They then both fall asleep until it was light outside.


	10. Chapter 10

Even though Buffy had thought Dawn had gone back to bed. She didn't. She went downstairs and out the front door that was left slightly open. She went out and saw Connor standing by the tree with his head resting against it.

"You crying?" Dawn asks. She sees Connor wiping his eyes with the back of his hand.

"Get lost kid." Connor snaps.

"Hey, not trying to be mean, just wondered if you're okay?"

"What do you care?" Connor snaps again and turns to look at her.

"Because I know what it feels like to see the person you like being with someone else. When I was longer I liked your dad, and most of Buffy's boyfriends. I once even liked Spike, before all the stuff he did to Buffy that is."

Connor looks at her and sees she can be human when they talk.

"Still like my dad?" Connor asks.

"No, not anymore. I saw they loved each other and I gave up on the idea, realising it was just a kid crush."

Connor nods and Dawn moves to sit on the floor a little closer to Connor, he joins her.

"Don't even bother trying to break them up." Dawn says. "You never will, even when Buffy had other partners as soon as they are back together, everyone else is ignored."

Connor nods, slightly understanding what she means.

"What am I mean to do? Buffy is the only one that's ever treated me like a normal person, dads always treated me like a kid, Fred, Gun and Wesley just see me as someone to keep secrets from and Cordelia thinks she is better then everyone so ignores me-"

"Some things never change." Dawn cuts in, I remember when I first met her I tried being nice and she just walked away saying she didn't have time to entertain children."

Connor nods.

They sit in silent for a while. "You know, we might not have seen eye to eye straight away but your not that bad I guess." Dawn smiles.

Connor nods, "I agree, I'm not that bad." He says with a cheeky smile.

Dawn laughs. "I better get to bed, I have school tomorrow… but after if you want something to do… we could go to the mall? I'm pretty sure Angel will hang around for a while to deal with Spike if he tries anything again. You going to stay if he does?"

"I'll stay until Spike is dead. I don't want him hurting Buffy." After a short pause he adds. "or you."

Dawn smiles again. "I'll see you tomorrow." She then gets up and goes back to bed ready for tomorrow, she had small butterflies in her belly from the excitement of tomorrow.

Connor sits for a while longer feeling a lot calmer after seeing Buffy and Angel kissing and he realised that even though Buffy was beautiful, strong and lovely, he would never be able to be with her and he realised he had a few butterflies for Dawn too.

An update woop!? Sorry for the wait, I did a scan on my laptop and I lost ALL my files so I had to sort out my fics and try getting back as much as I could. Not did I only lose my fics but also all photos of my niece from when she was born and pics of all my loved ones and pets that I no longer have. So sorry. Hope you like this chapter and that your more interested now! =D


	11. Chapter 11

The next day Dawn was at school and Connor watched TV and walked around the house. Buffy stayed in her room most of the day not feeling up to anything. She had woken up from a nightmare where Spike was on her again. Hurting her. She screamed and everyone was just watching not helping her. She felt as if her friends, including Angel, didn't care. That they wouldn't help her if she needed them. Could she trust them? _Of course you can, they have saved you many times, they just didn't know he was hurting you._ She thinks to herself.

Angel was downstairs with Connor after Buffy told him she wanted some space.

"What you doing?" He asks his son.

"What TV, what's it look like?" Connor's eyes stay on the screen.

Angel sits awkwardly next to him. They stay silent for a when Connor breaks the silence and says, "I'm sorry." He says with difficulty.

"Why?" Angel asks looking at him shocked.

"I couldn't have acted like a child. I knew Buffy loved you, that's why she was went to LA. I just saw her and she is so beautiful. I was jealous you had her. I acted like a child. I accused you hurt her on purpose. I only just realised that before you knew what happened, you only though she had been a slut and slept with a vampire that was only here because of you."

"Don't call her that." Angel snarls.

"I'm not, just saying I can understand why you were mad."

Angel nods and takes it in.

"I'm also sorry. I shouldn't have treated you the way I did. You protected Buffy when I didn't. Thank you."

Connor looks at his dad and gives a small smile and nod. "If you do get together though, I'm not calling her step mom."

"You don't even call me dad," they laugh, then on a more serious note, "But we won't be together." Angel saddens.

"Nothing can be done?" Connors questions.

"No, I would have found it by now. Still doesn't mean you can have her though."

"Don't worry, I know she is out of my ledge, not to mention I don't think Buffy likes guys younger then her. I mean her type, couple of hundred years old. I'm technically only a year old in this dimension."

"I don't think this could get any weirder." Angel states.

"Yeah," Connors agrees. "What do you mean?" he asks after thinking about it a little longer.

"Well I love Buffy after a hundred years, when I could have had anyone I wanted. We have the 'forbidden love' if that's what you want to call it that. Hundred years apart and then I have a son, she is now a teenager and you were only born about a year ago. Then Buffy dies twice, second time to save Dawn, who doesn't even exist." Angel finishes finding his Life and Buffy's rather strange.

"What? Dawn doesn't exist? What?" Connor looks at Angel confused.

Angel then explains that Dawn was created to open a hell dimension but as she was made from Buffy, she was able to close the portal. He explained that to close the portal then Dawn would have to die. Knowing this Buffy jumped in to save Dawn and the world.

"Wow, she's even hotter now."

Angel gives him a look.

"Sorry. But when was Dawn created? Yesterday she was talked as if she was a normal human."

Angel then continues, "we're not sure on a date but it was about a year or so ago we think. She a little before you I guess. But she was created as a teenager, she was never a baby. All memories I have with her in before she was created are fake, made us. For example one night I was at Buffy's window, we were kissing. Normally we would have gone out to patrol but she was grounded. When we were kissing Dawn came into her room and saw me, Buffy had to bribe her with sweets to make sure she didn't tell their mom. Dawn didn't exist as that time but because of these fake memories I don't know what it was actually like before. I guess me and Buffy would have still been kissing but wouldn't have been interrupted."

Connor nods slowly trying to take it all, and then eventually says, "God we are weird."

They laugh and then Dawn comes in.

"Hi, you two okay? You're talking." Dawn says.

"Yeah we sorted things out." Connor smiles at her. "Still want to go to the mall?"

Dawn nods and says, "Yep, let me just get my stuff and dump my school stuff. Where's Buffy?"

"In her room, she's not feeling great today. Think she had a bad dream. She told me she wanted to be alone." Angel says sadly.

"Must have been bad then." Dawn says, now worrying about her sister. "Maybe I should go see her."

"Don't worry Dawn, it's a lot for her to deal with. I'll make sure she is okay. You go out with Connor and I'll make her dinner. She will be fine."

Reassured by Angel Dawn goes to get ready.

"You are good to Buffy." Connor smiles at his dad.

"Just make sure you look after her little sister. You know what is out there, she isn't the greatest fighter." Angel says.

"I'll protect her."

Dawn comes back down the stairs and says she is ready.

"Come on dad, cough up?" Connor says with his hand out.

"Cough up?" Angel asks then realised Connor wants money. "I only have my card on me."

"You're a vampire why do you have a card?" Dawn asks.

"I have my own business, my own money so I need a card to access it. Also I buy blood with it so I don't kill humans, unless you would prefer that?"

"No, that's fine." Dawn smiles.

"Don't spend loads on it and don't let her have control of it, Summers women like to spend money."

"Not hard to believe." Connors says as he walks out the door with Dawn.

* * *

To everyone celebrating it, Merry Christmas. I know it isn't super long but I am updating all fics apart from The Painful Secret due to it needing more time as it is at such an important part of the story. Again thanks for reading. Hope you enjoy.


End file.
